Thank You!

Thank you, undoubtedly the most underrated phrase on this planet. No, I’m not talking about being thankful towards other people in your life (that’s a separate matter of discussion anyways!), but being thankful towards your own life!

So we get up every morning, travel to work, crib about the insane traffic on the streets or crowd in the public transport, crib about being at work, cry about the extra work hours, go back home, while away our time on the internet and sleep. This accounts for 60/70% of an average human’s life. While studying they can’t wait to work, while working they can’t wait to relax, while on vacation they dread the end of vacation and during retirement, they don’t know how they’ve spent their life.

We as humans have the tendency to take everything in our life for granted. Be it the food that we eat, the house we live in, the clothes we wear, the people we interact with, or a thing as simple as the air that we breathe. We keep waiting for something amazing to take place in our life, to earn more money, a better job, a better house, basically we keep sending happiness on a chase for a “better” something. Why do we end up making happiness a journey always? Since we’ve sent “our” happiness on a chase, we struggle to keep up with the journey and get depressed, anxious, sad and upset when the path seems too long. What we don’t realize is that we can convert this journey into an interesting ride and enjoy every millisecond of it!

When I was a kid, all I wanted to do was to grow up and earn money so that our family could have a better life. As an adult who has achieved most of her childhood dreams, I still feel that my life is unfulfilled because I’ve replaced my childhood goals with a new set of goals and sent my happiness on a chase again. Getting my house renovated has always been one of my biggest and most prominent dream as a child. As I’m typing this, my house is being renovated and instead of feeling accomplished, I’m still waiting for a miracle to dramatically transform my life! Do I need to find any newer or better ways to complicate my happiness, hell no!

I’m glad I’ve had this realisation finally! Happiness, in fact, is a very simple process.

• Live in the present moment:- The best way to do this is inculcating the practice of journaling your daily life. Treat every day as the D-day rather than as a  run-up to the main event. After all, each day is precious, you’d never know if you’d live to see another day. So stop stalling all the pending items on your bucket list, treat life as a grand celebration and thoroughly enjoy each day of your life. And journaling it will help you reminisce.
• Practice gratitude:- This is most important. If we keep finding things to crib about, we’ll keep sending our happiness on a life long chase. Recollecting and writing down things you are grateful about will help instill a sense of achievement, fulfillment and most importantly happiness in you. Instead of cribbing about everything in life, we can just be grateful for the small little things that build the grandeur of our life.
• Be the “best” you:- Since it’s very evident from the first point that we need to pull ourselves out from the regretful past and uncertain future, we shouldn’t delay our goals, wait for a certain something to take place or a future period to achieve whatever we have set our heart to do. The best time is always “NOW“. So strive to be the best version of you every day, make each day count and crush all your goals in the present. Bring a full stop to your never-ending “waiting period”.

Sounds simple ain’t it? Wonder if it actually works? Well, no other way to find out than actually putting it to action! Let’s not complicate happiness anymore!

 

L.O.N.E.R.

I’ve always been a shy, introverted kid. I never really wanted to have a big group of bff’s to share my life with. I’ve always loved my own personal space. Being on my own, with my thoughts used to be my favourite passtime. I could never really grow out of it.

However, as years passed by, I’ve turned into this person who needs soemeone around. I constantly check my messages to find something interesting. I keep flipping my phone to come accross something that can kill my boredom. I watch movies and series as much as I can. I try to spend time with my younger sister as much as possible. But, if there is any change in this routine (like yesterday when my sister was busy with something and needed the laptop), I almost died of inactivity.

Of late I’ve been feeling a lack of enthusiasm, lack of purpose in my life. I really have no clue why I have this feeling. But, it’s something I cannot hide away from.

Ironically, I hate getting up in the mornings, being a morning person! I thought deeply about this today and realised I do not seem to look forward to the mornings anymore. In fact, there is nothing to be excited about anyday as a matter of fact. I do not have any long term or short term goals. My future seems hazy! And no, I’m not sad or depressed!

I just lack focus! I’m unenthusiatic and unmotivated! I’ve recently joined a workplace where everyone seems super energetic and motivated and it has had an adverse effect on me. Instead of being inspired by them, I’ve started questioning my own life’s decisions!

While in school, I had my studies to look forward to, I wanted to top the class.

Come college, I wanted to do well in my 12th boards!

Degree college bought with it my identity, Charetered Accountancy course which I wanted to excel in!

Now, everything is done and dusted! I am a C.A., have a stable job, my regular set of friends who are quiet busy with their lives! There is nothing exciting about my life anymore!

I want to feel alive again! But I’m completely clueless about how to go about it.

There is one thing I’ve been delaying for a very long time. I’ll wake up early and go on a run tomorrow onwards! Let’s see how that turns out!

I really want to fall in love with my life! I’ll try to make an honest effort to achieve just that!

Wish me luck!

Getting out of my comfort zone

It was my first day at my new job today. This place is everything I wanted my dream job to be like. Extremely knowledgeable people, great office environment, fixed timings, great brand, yet, I feel weird.

There is this intense feeling of discomfort that is plaguing my mind. I just can’t come to terms with the fact that opportunities lie outside the comfort zone. In my previous organisation, I knew everything and everyone, everything and everyone knew me. I didn’t like the people there nor the office timings, yet, I want to go back and hide myself there.

What is wrong? Why do I feel so uncomfortable at a place that feels so right! Well, that’s the cost to pay when you venture out of your comfort zone. The comfort zone is a place which protects you from any kind of fear. New places brings with it unknown situations, uncomfortable meetings, it tests your knowledge and your ability to deal with new surroundings. All this ain’t pretty. Especially, for an introvert like me. Introverts like to conserve as much energy as possible. They lose energy and hope as soon as they have to encounter a new situation.

It’s time to be more positive and embrace my reality. Living my life one day at a time might help. I either live in the past or find myself dreaming about the future. Present is never an option for me.

Embracing every moment of the present situation will help me recuperate and that’s what I am going to do. It was my decision to move out of the situation I was in and upgrade my life. Now, I need to be more mature and responsible about my decisions. Happiness is a continuous process. You cannot wait for it to find it’s way to you. Happiness sometimes requires effort. Your mind needs to free and clutter free in order to create a nurturing house for it to stay in for a long time.

While I go back to my reality, I urge you all to give the uncomfortable situation you are currently facing, another chance. Just remember, this feeling too shall pass. It is just an illusion created by your mind to protect you from prospective fearful situations. And believe me, you are stronger than that! So, fight the FEAR.!

Know when to let go..!!

I am a person who dwells on the past. It is not a bad thing to revisit your memories, however it becomes a problem when your past affects the present. There are a million thoughts that race through your mind throughout the day. My thoughts range from regrets about the past to imagining situations about how I would have reacted in the same situation differently. One of my favourite hobbies is also thinking about a parallel universe where each one of my impossible thoughts come true. These kind of thoughts generate negativity about the present and also the future. You would find me staring at blank walls most of the time immersed in my own thoughts.

I’ve also seen people dragging a dead relationship. We meet a lot of people in our life, some we connect with mutually, some we don’t. The third and most painful situation is when one person wants to connect with someone who is least bothered. People who overthink tend to convince themselves to keep on trying. The phrase “If at once we don’t succeed, try, try and try again!” is drilled in our minds throughout school. We keep on trying and lose our dignity and self respect in the process.

It is very important to know when to stop.

When your thoughts over power your present as well as cast a shadow on your future, you need to stop.

Everyone has a lot of dreams and goals in our life. The situations I mentioned above create pitfalls in your journey to achieve these goals. We admire people who are extremely focussed in their life and keep on climbing the ladder of success. What we forget is the fact that each one of us possess infinite amount of ability to reach the pinnacle of success. People who end up succeeding in life are ones who have mastered the art of using thoughts to their advantage. There will be situations in life that side track you from your goals. In such scenarios, you need to keep your inner belief system strong. Always remember the below 3 points before making any irrational decision :-

• Be the master of your life, not the victim – “Live life as per your terms”
• Keep your dignity and self esteem in check – “Someone else cannot define you”
• You can achieve everything you set your mind to – “Nothing is impossible”

Be the person you wish to be “NOW”, there is never a better time. Always stay in the present and witness wonderful events unfold in your life.

If you are caught up in the web of self pity and despise, please go through the above 3 points again. The points though basic, can have a huge impact on you if you choose to believe in it.

All the best!!

Why do I procrastinate?

Oh well! Not again!!

I know there are thousands of articles on the internet and a million books written to tackle the massive issue of “Procrastination!” However, even after reading and learning about them in depth, I still haven’t been able to wad off procrastination completely! WHY?

We all know that procrastination brings with itself unwanted anxiety and negativity. Somehow, I’ve become too comfortable with it. Every single day I wake up with the single most thought of completing my work and leave office ON TIME. However, even on lean days I find myself working till the last moment and reach home late…YET AGAIN! What the hell is wrong with me?

Another example that comes to my mind is preparing for any big interview or work assignment. I’ll try to get as much time possible to prepare well and end up wasting (with enormous guilt!) all the time I have on hand. I find myself preparing and working at the last moment as usual and blow up the big opportunity.

So, why do I keep on repeating the same mistakes again? Am I too dumb to understand what’s going wrong and not able to apply corrective measures? Or am I happy with the way things are and don’t want to change anything?

The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE!

Well, while dealing with procrastination, the biggest mistake everyone makes is to connect it with laziness. I agree, there are people who do not get things done because they are too lazy to work straight away. However, there are few people who genuinely crave to get rid of procrastination and are still unable to do so. Here’s a little glimpse of their thought process in advance of a new assignment :-

• STAGE 1 : THE BEGINNING – A new assignment!! A clean slate for me to work on. Let me gather all the neccessary tools to conquer this! I’m going to slay this!
• STAGE 2 : ERROR ALERT – You make a little unimportant mistake somewhere and your mind starts churning “ALERT” messages. You try to ignore them and keep working.
• STAGE 3 : ENTER “FEAR” –  The big “F”. The biggest villain in anyone’s life. The reason why people quit things midway and are happy in the comfort zone. It makes people believe “IT’S BETTER NOT TO TRY THAN TO END UP FAILING”
• STAGE 4 : I QUIT –  The well known result of extreme procrastinators. Quit everything you do midway, do it at the last moment as it gives you a solid support in case you fail. You can always end up blaming your “procrastination” for the failure instead of embracing it.

That’s it. You do not want to accept “FAILURE” and stick to procrastination as it saves you the trouble of believing that you’ve failed because of  your incompetancy. You want to live in a bubble where failure doesn’t exist. Even if you fail, it’s because of “procrastination” and NOT because of YOU! You can always hear procrastinators say “If only I did not procrastinate, I would have succeeded!” That’s their defence mechanism churning nonsensical excuses to help them deal with reality.

So, how do you get over this?

ACCEPTANCE & REHEARSAL

ACCEPTANCE – You need to accept the fact that failure is a part and parcel of life. You can try your best for all the assignments you work for and still end up failing it. That doesn’t mean you are not doing well. Each mistake is a learning opportunity. Try not to repeat the same mistake again instead of avoiding it completely. Committing a mistake provides you an opportunity  and experience to correct it the next time. Avoiding it keeps the ground wide open to commit it again. So, it’s always important to try!

REHEARSAL – Instead of blowing up the big chance that comes your way, why don’t rehearse for it? Try working a little each day to prepare yourself for the big event. Anticipate the future course of action and start preparing for it. You always have a faint idea of the opportunities that could come your way in alignment with your goals in life. Utilise each day to prepare for it so that your fear is weakened on the D-day. Fuel your strengths not your fears!

Hopefully this summarises the thought process of procrastinators and provides valuable insights to deal with it in a better manner.

More power to the procrastinators!!

Ciao!