Monthly recap : August 2021

I tried my level best to focus on recovery and to get back on track this month, Quiet happy with my progress.

Mental health

• Meditated for 26/31 days.
• Journaled/documented my day for 0/31 days
• Practiced gratitude journaling for 0/31 days.

Personal Growth

This section is for a new skill or talent that I’ve acquired in this month, tried a new activity or thing that has pushed me out of my comfort zone.

• I got a promotion in office to a new designation. I also gave 1 very exciting job interview this month that helped push me out of my comfort zone. I tried new things at work and rejoined office after my covid quarantine in a renewed manner. My main focus is on developing a growth mindset in life. This mindset gives me confidence to confront challenges and work consistently harder to become the best version of myself.

Workouts

• Zero outdoor/indoor runs
• Worked out for 20/31 days

Education

• Zero progress with CFA level 1 curriculum. Exam has been deferred to February 15 2022. I’ve ordered books for the new curriculum and I’m all set to give my best for this exam.
• Zero online courses completed in August.

Entertainment

• Completed reading 3 books (my highest record till date) and halfway through 4th book. The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, Mindset by Carol Dweck and Atomic Habits by James Clear. It’s safe to say that these 3 books have helped me transform my life in more ways than one. They have redirected the course of my life and made me change my thought patterns. I would especially like to give biggest credit to the book “Mindset”. I try to take all decisions in my life based on the philosophies shared in this book. It has made me confident to face challenges head on and not be afraid of making mistakes in life.
• Halfway through Scam 1992 which is a web series based on the Indian stock and money market scam in 1992. I not only found it extremely entertaining but it is knowledgeable as well.

It’s been 3 years that I’ve felt stuck in my professional life but haven’t particularly made any efforts to try new things at work. I’ve always blamed my external environment for everything that was wrong with my career. It came as a huge shock to me when it finally dawned to me that I possessed all the aspects of a “fixed mindset” at work. I was scared of challenges, tend to believe that skill/talent is a limited resource and didn’t trust myself to do better than this. The book “MINDSET” by Carol Dweck opened up my mind to new possibilities and I’m excited to try each one of them.

To new beginnings and growth mindset!

Monthly recap : July 2021

I don’t have much to share in this month’s recap as well. My mom was diagnosed with covid on 13th July and subsequently on 17th July, the rest of the family (including me) tested positive. I didn’t feel like doing any of the self care activities during this time. However, in the hindsight, I truly believe that spending some time on self care each day could have helped me cope up with this demanding phase of life in a much better manner. Lesson learnt.

Mental health

• Meditated for 1/31 days.
• Journaled/documented my day for 0 days.
• Practiced gratitude journaling for 0 days.

Personal Growth

This section is for a new skill or talent that I’ve acquired in this month, tried a new activity or thing that has pushed me out of my comfort zone.

• I handled the household responsibilities and took care of my mom as she was diagnosed with covid a week before us. Although it isn’t a talent or a skill to be talked about, I’m glad I was able to pull through this mentally exhausting phase.

Workouts

• Zero outdoor/indoor runs
• Worked out for 4/31 days

Education

• Zero progress with CFA level 1 curriculum. Exam has been deferred to March 2022.
• Zero online courses completed in July

Entertainment

• Completed reading 1 book – Mint your money by Pranjal Kamra. It’s an amazing read especially for the ones who want to understand the basics and begin their financial planning journey. (More than halfway through 2 books.)
• I watched the season 2 of Never Have I Ever and absolutely loved it. It distracted me from all that was going on at home when we were recovering from covid. A must watch!
• Also breezed through Mimi on Netflix. Pretty mediocre, can be skipped.

Ending on a positive note and hoping that I can start afresh and accomplish the goals that I set for August.

Monthly recap : April 2021

Day 30/30

Aah, it’s the end of April and with it ends my least productive month. I haven’t even reached close to completing any of my goals for this month and that’s OKAY. This month has been tumultuous with the second wave of covid hitting India, constant rise in covid cases, my closed ones getting infected and hospitalized thus causing us trying to battle anxiety and fear every single day. It has been a hell of a month. And I’m glad it’s over.

Although it shouldn’t be the case but I feel motivated by the start of a new month. It feels fresh with new possibilities and hope. A fresh new start to my goals, it’s like hitting the reset button and starting afresh. And I need this refresh more than ever this month.

I’ve planned a lot of things for May in my head. Will write it down in my journal tonight. But I’ll refrain from making huge commitments here. I really want to stick by all my plans this month. The most important aspect surrounding all of my goals for May is developing mental strength and inner happiness. What I’ll be doing differently to make sure I stick to my plans is to track my time (every tiny detail for at least a month) so that I’m aware of how well (read horribly) I use it. I’m pretty excited for May.

Mental health

• Meditated for 16/30 days. No excuses, no genuine reasons. I was lazy on some days, anxious on others but in general not disciplined enough to follow my routine
• Journaled/documented my day for 0 days. Nil, absolutely none!
• Practiced gratitude journaling for 0 days. No where to hide!

Personal Growth

This section is for a new skill or talent that I’ve acquired in this month, tried a new activity or thing that has pushed me out of my comfort zone.

• I gave a job interview that was pretty tough. I’m glad I ventured out of my comfort zone and faced my fear. It was a good experience!

Workouts

• 1 long run in this month. 13 kms on my birthday
• HIIT workouts twice a week during the weekdays (ranging from 20 to 30 mins). Longest workout streak of 5 days last week.

Education

• Zero progress with CFA level 1 curriculum.
• Zero online courses completed in March

Entertainment

• Completed reading 0 books 
• Watched 2 amazing movies this month that I couldn’t stop raving about. Bollywood movies Paglait and Ludo are an absolute must watch.

May, let’s get it!!!!

Thankful, Grateful

Day 29/30

And it’s almost time to end the April writing challenge. I have one more day to go but that’s fixed for my monthly recap so this is final write up. April is my most favorite month of the year as it’s my birth month. I started off 2021 with immense positivity and hope and promised to carry it throughout the year. This month really tested my patience and anxiety levels. I’m trying to fight it with whatever means I can. This month has been my least productive month of all. You might think of me as someone who obsesses over productivity and progress all the time. I don’t know why I’m wired this way, being productive gives a huge boost to my energy levels and instantly makes me happy.

I’ve written for 29 days in row and am really grateful for all the experiences, thoughts, emotions I had while writing my daily posts throughout this month. It has been a long month and I have spent most time of this month slacking. I’d still not bash myself for it. It’s been a tough month mentally and I’m taking my own sweet time to come to terms with it. I do want to get past this slump soon and get back on track. Because having a powerful routine and following it to the tee truly makes me happy. That’s the fact of my life and I need to embrace it.

Thankful for all my blogger friends who took time out to read and comment on my posts. It means a LOT. It encouraged me to post on days when I absolutely didn’t want to. You helped me keep going and now I have a month long blogging streak to my credit. This feels incredible.

One day left in April that I need to utilize well to prepare for a new month and all my goals attached to it. Let’s make the best of it.

Paradigm shift

Day 28/30

I signed up for a “time management course” to learn how to eradicate my procrastination once and for all. Guess who has been procrastinating on completing the minuscule 90 min course, ME! I can’t stop laughing thinking about this.

Anyways, time to get back to serious business. So I did try to make few changes in today’s routine based on whatever I could recollect from watching the first half of this course in an absolutely sleepy state. I made a very detailed hour by hour schedule yesterday for today and the best thing I could achieve from the extremely elaborate schedule was my meditation and workout. I have been off the radar for more than a month now. The plight of our country during the covid 19 second wave and the unexpected death in my extended family has put me in a very distracted state of mind.

There is no one way to calm an anxious mind. Anxiety partially comes from the feeling of losing control of our life. And I wish to tackle this specific aspect to win over my anxiety. Taking control of our life starts from the decision to try and take action. If there’s one thing you’ve been procrastinating on from quiet sometime for no apparent reason, like ordering a thing from your wish list or calling a friend, try and force yourself to do that very thing tomorrow and you’ve begun your journey of reclaiming control of your goddamn life. It’s honestly really weird that it’s our mind who wishes to achieve great things in life and the only thing that stops from doing all that is again, our MIND! How is that even possible?

Now that it’s established that everything that you need to change yourself is in your MIND, what stops you from working on it?

Is there a vision of a new you in your mind? A skill you want to develop, a language a want to learn, a job you wish to get, a life you wish to own? Make a list of all these things. Everything your best version should be doing and break it down into a daily routine. Don’t underestimate the power of compounding my friend! Oh, but what do we do to keep the lure of “instant gratification” at bay?

Apply the 1 level up rule. Tomorrow, make a plan to get 1 level better in your goals from yesterday. For example, one extra rep in your workouts or 1 extra page of your book or 1 extra chapter in your studies. Just 1 level up. It’s a relatively small number so won’t be difficult to achieve. However, every drop counts to make an ocean, this 1 level up progress will make a considerable dent in the progress of your goal. Sounds easy? So should we get a head start on the biggest project of our life? The future me that I would be proud of.

Let’s do this!

Action replay

“All it takes one song to bring back 1000 memories.”

-Anonymous

Day 9/30

While mindlessly scrolling through YouTube today, I stumbled upon an old song that I was addicted to as a kid. I played the song and it felt like I was transported back to my childhood days when I used to listen to that song on loop. Who needs a time machine to revisit your past when you have music? I relived every single memory I had of those times when I used to listen to this song, my thoughts, aspirations and dreams during those time and most importantly, my innocence. Before all the setbacks and failures, the roller coaster like ups and downs in life, I was a young kid beaming with POSITIVITY and HOPE for the future. I used to think and believe that I will achieve all my goals and get everything I ever dreamed of. After all, hope is all I had during those days.

I also experienced deep emotions. I used to smile, laugh and also cry a lot. Now I’ve turned into a zombie who rarely cries and can literally count on her fingers, the last time I experienced the feeling of exhilaration and excitement in life. Life was so different back then. I had envisioned my life in a much different manner as a kid. I’m grateful for all the opportunities and blessings in my life. But, I want to be hopeful again, in the same manner and passion as I was as a kid.

There were certain things that I thought I’ll experience for sure (especially after watching countless rom-coms) which still haven’t panned out in my life. There are many things that have happened in my life that I could never dream of, I’m extremely grateful to the Universe for bringing abundance in my life, in the form of food, financial stability and opportunities.

I am currently reading a book called “Flow” by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. If you’ve seen the Arabian Nights, you would know how Aladdin felt when Genie told him that he will grant him 3 wishes (anything that he could dream of). This is how I feel with this book in my hand. The tagline of Flow is “The classic work on how to achieve happiness“. That’s what I need, I want to be happy, in any circumstances. Even if I fumble or fall, I want to bounce back stronger.

In Csikszentmihalyi’s words, flow is “a state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter; the experience is so enjoyable that people will continue to do it even at great cost, for the sheer sake of doing it” (1990)

Now imagine if you know how to be in flow, always. You’ll have a much better quality of life and be HAPPY effortlessly. That’s what I seek. I plan to read this book over the weekend so that I can reset my life and start afresh. I want to completely get rid of the feeling of being STUCK in life and I trust this book to get me out of this dilemma.

Let’s do this.

Consistency > Motivation

“Success isn’t always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.”

-Dwayne Johnson

Day 7/30

As I was binge eating chocolate today, watching videos of amazing fitness influencers smashing their workouts, I thought to myself begrudgingly, “It’ll take me years to reach their level!”. It’s funny how I decided that I might be able to do it, without trying my hand at it. I have been working out for close to 2.5 years now, the intensity and passion in my effort has worn off sharply since the first 3 months of my fitness journey. The first 3 months were intense and I was extremely motivated to lose weight. That was my sole purpose in life during those 3 months. Ever since I lost weight, I have given myself the leeway to give up fairly easily, have no restrictions in my diet, skip my workouts, be indisciplined at times with the only excuse of, “I deserve it this time, I’ll get back on track tomorrow.” And that tomorrow never comes.

It’s easier to be consistent than wait for our motivation to support us in our goals. The journey towards achieving our goals is set on a long, winding and difficult path. If we wait for our motivation to help us scale this journey, we might have to take frequent breaks and delay the journey by a couple of years. However, being consistent and working on our goals everyday, in the best way possible, shows definite results over time. The wait is excruciatingly painful but can be borne by frequently rewarding ourselves on achieving our daily tasks.

Also the best way to be consistent is to make a habit out of it. Force yourself to stick to a schedule for at least a month or till the time it feels weird when you skip it. Once this is achieved, being consistent is comparatively easy. There are many ups and downs in every human’s life. As I was talking to someone close to me today (the most talented person I know), I understood how negative thoughts can absolutely DESTROY a human being. I know she is capable of GREAT things in life however her mind has total control over her actions. Her negative self talk flares up, especially during important events in her life and clouds her judgement. She ends up losing a lot of great opportunities to take her life to the next level and witnessing this physically hurts me. I realized from her experience that I do not wish to give the negative thought process in my mind any attention and DO WHAT’S BEST TO TAKE MY LIFE TO THE NEXT LEVEL, always! I want to be clear on what I want to do and be in life. Right now, I’m on the brink of losing everything to negativity. I wish to change it, FOREVER.

Is it possible,

• to never succumb to negativity?
• to have total control of our mind?
• to use our mind to our advantage, always?
• to make the best choices for success in life?
• to be in sync with the Universe?
• to ignite our motivation when we need it?

I don’t know the answers to these questions yet but I wish to learn them soon. I’ll start with self introspection and understanding my short and long term goals in life. Once I have these written down, I’ll devise a daily routine that helps me work on all of my goals, brick by brick, each day. The most important aspect is to be CONSISTENT at it, by hook or by crook.

Let’s do this!

24 hours

“Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal. Live this day as if it were your last. The past is over and gone. The future is not guaranteed.”

–Wayne Dyer

Day 5/30

How to make the best use of your time? Start living in the moment. I know, I know! It’s easier said than done. I am never in the moment. When I was a kid, I used to perpetually live in the past. I used to keep rewinding my life experiences and regret everything that I felt was wrong with it. I always wanted to do better, be better. Nothing was perfect enough for me.

When I grew up and started working, I started living in the future as well as past. I used to day dream about my bucket list and dream of achieving them. Again nothing in the present moment felt right. I kept my expectations high and mentally strained myself to achieve all of them in order to feel happy.

It was in lockdown last year when I discovered the foolproof way of being happy. I started applying this trick in my life and it effortlessly made me happy, every single time. At a time when I felt that everything was going wrong with my life, I found it very easy to find things that made me happy, effortlessly. How did I do it?

I started paying attention and found happiness in small things!

From getting a window seat in bus to listening to my favorite BTS song, these tiny actions made me happy than I’ve ever felt in my life. It was a tough time to deal with and under usual circumstances, I would have succumbed to the negativity in my life. But I was so tired of being anxious, scared, unhappy and bored with my life that I was willing to try anything.

I have been feeling very bored and useless since the last 2 weeks. Though I don’t know the reason behind it, I am extremely tired of it. I am FED UP. I want to feel alive, energetic and happy again. I never want to feel like this in my life again. I have taken time for granted. I purposely waste my time for no reason and wait for the day to end. I while my time doing things that I don’t actually wish to do. I sense a huge loss of control in my life and I desperately want it BACK.

I am going to take life, ONE DAY AT A TIME. Ever day is beautiful and I wish to live each day to the fullest. I know rest days are important and help you recharge and rejuvenate. However, I have never felt “rejuvenated” after prolonged period of rest. I am extremely low on energy and motivation. Consistent efforts on our goals are always better than going all out on important occasions. Good habits require regular practice and consistency, in short, our efforts!

These are few good habits that I wish to incorporate in my life :-

• Plan your new day the night before
• Wake up at 5 am daily
• Meditate for 20 mins daily
• Workout for 30 mins minimum
• Gratitude journaling/ daily journaling
• Read 40 pages daily
• Study for your career progression
• Revisit your goal progress at the end of each day

This is the first challenge of my “Lifestyle transformation” journey. I am on my way to make every day worthwhile and earn my leave. Let’s do this!

A second chance

“Life is all about second chances. Not in every single aspect, of course, but we’re often granted a “re-do” without even realizing it.”

-Anonymous

Day 4/30

I got a message from my boss today saying that we need to start working from home again for 50% of workdays, effective immediately. The covid-19 cases have been on a constant rise in our state since the past few weeks. Knowing my organization, I had zero expectation from them to take any action towards their employees safety. However, the situation has turned far too dangerous now for our organization to remain indifferent. Also our state government has enforced strict restrictions starting tomorrow which forced our organization to fall back to the work from home routine once again.

Once I start working from home again, I will have great of time on hand to pursue my other passions such as reading, blogging, working out, journaling, completing online courses and other activities for overall personal development. I really didn’t want to play the victim card and blame lack of time for my laziness to pursue my other hobbies. However, work from home will effectively give me more than 5 hrs a day that I can spend on improving my overall life (if utilized well). When we were asked to come back to office fulltime in January this year, I never thought I’ll ever get the chance again to work from home. I had a great time last year working from home and staying away from my office (which makes me feel trapped) as long as possible. My prayers, wishes, cries have been answered from the Universe in the form of work from home for at least half of this month. I believe this is a golden opportunity for me to do everything that I couldn’t do this year due to lack of time (classic excuse!). Despite my hectic weekday office routine, I did try to workout, meditate and read books as much as possible however the situation is way different when you are at home.

There are a 100 things on my mind that’ll help me make effective use of all the time I’ll have on hand once I start working from home. I can sense this is a golden sign from the Universe saying that my life is about to change, FOR THE BETTER! I want to believe in this and I do BELEIVE IN IT. I trust myself to not give up EVER and keep doing my absolute BEST in life, in everything I do. In return, the Universe will reciprocate by giving me the life of my dreams. A life where happiness is abundant and every other experience helps you cope up better and learn new things.

Looking forward to the second chance that Universe has given me.

Yesterday, I had thought to embark on the most challenging journey of my life. Close to 2 years back, fitness and lifestyle influencer Cassey Ho went on a 90 day journey to get into the BEST shape of her life, PHYSICALLY and MENTALLY. More than a physical change, I really wish to make a huge change to my lifestyle and habits impacting my mental health. My current thought process makes me feel drained and unmotivated 99% of time. I wish to CHANGE this for the better. My goal is to feel STRONG, ENERGETIC, FOCUSSED and MOTIVATED (physically and mentally) for most part of my life. And when I do end up feeling BLAH (because that’s inevitable), I wish to create a strong routine that helps me bounce back to my focused self in no time. Our time on this planet is limited and I wish to make full use of it. I do not wish to waste it by feeling sad most part of my life. This has got to change.

Looking forward to a brand new week and some big changes in my lifestyle.

More on my “Lifestyle change Journey” tomorrow.

Get over it

“You just can’t let life happen to you, you have to make life happen.”

― Idowu Koyenikan

Day 2/30

Today has been a pretty lazy day. I was so inactive throughout the day that I chose lying on the bed, thinking about nothing whatsoever over blogging despite making a commitment to myself (and my blog). For the longest time, I wanted to find a foolproof way to make my weekends productive. I know, we need to rewind and rest, that’s very essential for our physical as well as mental well being. However, I mindlessly waste my weekend, doing absolutely nothing and that makes me feel extremely guilty by the end of it. I don’t wish to have those extended guilt tripped thoughts anymore.

I know few ways (through years of watching ted talks, reading 100s of self help books and observing my thought patterns) to overcome the lazy mode and get around to do something. I know it’s weird that I still end up being unproductive when I am totally aware of the techniques to avoid it. The key here is “intention“. When you really wish to do something in life, you do it regardless of the hurdles and problems you face. When your mind has given up on you and your life, all you wish to do is “NOTHING“.

I’m sick of doing and feeling “nothing”. I don’t know my purpose in life yet but I do know that it would most definitely involve “experiencing life in it’s glory“. It’s challenging, hard, hectic but beautiful nevertheless. In order to do so, we need to may follow the below steps :-

• Positive self talk/affirmations : Have you ever tried complimenting yourself in front of the mirror? Try it as soon as you can. It may seem a little awkward at first but soon you’ll get used to uplifting yourself than shredding yourself to pieces. Indulge in a little self care session of talking about your achievements, your goals, your skills, yourself in general. This will surely uplift your mood, charge you up for the day ahead and make you feel really great in your skin. You can add this as part of your daily routine (especially at bedtime) so that you wake up energized, ready to seize the day.
• Make a to-do list : I cannot stress enough on the importance of this step. If we don’t know what we are supposed to do during the day, we end up wasting time doing nothing. It’s very important to be aware of your tasks for the day and the time slots to complete it. A to-do list prepared the night before gives you enough motivation to wake up in the morning and provides the direction to complete all your tasks in an efficient manner. “When in doubt, note it down!“
• Meditate and workout : These activities are known to make people happy, positive and energized. Doing it first thing after you wake up makes you feel productive right after staring your day and sets the tone for the rest of the day. If you are a beginner, try by doing it for just 5 mins each. You will most definitely feel better after it’s done and dusted. If you have done it before, be insanely consistent with it. No excuses!
• Live in the present moment : Meditation helps in focusing our attention on our breath and ignore the chatterbox that lives rent-free in our mind. Journaling is a great way to rethink about the day, find out the highlights of the day and write it down for posterity. This simple yet powerful activity is sure to bring your attention back to the present moment. Procrastination is fear in disguise (at least in my case). When I fear that I might not be able to do a task, scared to attempt a new thing, avoid social interactions, fear that I might make a fool of myself in front of others, I procrastinate. Work on being confident in your own skin, do the things that scare you the most, attempt new things, this will help in developing your confidence, from scratch.
• Cut out refined sugar : Sugar feels great for your taste buds but your body despises it. It makes you feel bloated, adds unnecessary weight to your mind and body, makes you feel lethargic, has zero nutrient value, pulls you ten steps backward from your fitness goals and breaks you out at times. Find out ways to avoid cravings. I used to crave something sweet after my lunch each day. I have started to drink green tea right after lunch to curb those cravings and so far it’s working well. Of course I lose track many times and eat beyond limits, but it’s great if you cut it out completely from your diet to feel better about yourself (mind and body).
• Portion control your meals : It’s no suspense that eating excess food drags you down and makes you feel drowsy and lethargic. Be grateful for every meal and eat mindfully. Remember that food is a necessary fuel to help you survive. Don’t associate your happiness levels to the amount of food on your plate. Eat right and feel good throughout the day. I just saw a brilliant technique to avoid overeating online. 30 mins before your schedules meal, drink water so that you don’t confuse thirst with hunger.

I guess that’s all I have for today. I am going to follow these steps this moment onwards. I’m tired of living a directionless life and it’s high time that I change (for the better). Let’s do this!